Hi Roomsponsor,
I’m Sophie, I’m 23 years old and I have lived with the YMCA for a couple of months now and I love it.
I want to share my experience with you because I hope it will help others in the future. I want to raise awareness around how other young people can get the help and support they deserve from YMCA.
When I was young I had to live with my Grandparents. I was very young and don’t remember dates and periods of time of when I was there, but this was due to my Mam being a drug user. She was not able to look after me. I have 16 siblings between my mam and dad. We don’t all have the same parents, I know them but I don’t see them and we didn’t grow up together.
When I was about 14 I wanted to see my mam so I went to stay with her to get to know her and my twin siblings. They were about 4. I have never lived with my dad. My Grandparents were very upset by me leaving and this damaged our relationship. We are now getting on better and they are proud of what I have achieved so far. I moved back with my mam because I was young and wanted to be with her. My younger twin siblings were not being looked after very well so eventually I dropped out of school and looked after them. I was only 14 at this time.
Mam would not always be home and we were left to fend for ourselves. Our next door neighbour would let me take them to hers for breakfast and in return I would walk her kids to school. At night I would pick them all up and the same neighbour would give us tea. My mam had already had children taken away from her.
Just before my 16th birthday with pressure from my grandparents I went back to them. The twins were taken off Mam and adopted.
At 16 I then fell pregnant and we fell out as they didn’t agree with it so I had to move out. I was offered a temporary place to stay by a local housing scheme and had my daughter. Whilst living there I met my boyfriend and we soon moved into another property together.
I only lived with him for 3 months as it quickly turned into an abusive relationship and I had to leave to go and live with family members so myself and my baby could be safe. He kept turning up at my house and harassing me, being violent, so I had to keep calling the police and eventually I wasn’t allowed to go back to the house in case he turned up.
My mental health was an issue for me and I tried to take my own life once in 2013. Everything was getting on top of me. 8 weeks after having my little girl, my little twin siblings were moved to Norway with their adopted family and I was devastated. I got diagnosed with reactive depression. It wasn’t anything to do with my little girl but what with the abusive relationship, there was too much going on. I had bereavement counselling which really helped me to cope and I’m also on medication for depression and anxiety.
I thought things were on the up and I found a property local to family and lived there for about two years. I started working full time but eventually I couldn’t afford the rent along with childcare so I got into a lot of debt and that’s when I became homeless. Two weeks before I got evicted I made the heart-breaking decision to give up my little girl to her paternal grandparents because it wasn’t going to be fair to drag a 3 year old around with nowhere to live. I lost my home and my little girl when I was only 17 years old. I still have a close relationship with my daughter and get to have her every other weekend and I’m grateful YMCA has helped to accommodate this.
I was sofa surfing and worked various roles to make some money for about 2 years. I stayed from place to place including at one of the delivery drivers houses who I worked with at a pizza shop. I didn’t really know him but it was a roof over my head for a few months. I also stayed at my brothers, with an ex-boyfriend, at a hostel, a lady who I worked with at a taxi rank – the list goes on.
Each day was a struggle. I was then offered a room at a community house with other adults and really hated it. They were all using drugs and I would get into arguments with the other residents. I stayed here for 7 months. It was full of alcoholics and there were always needles left on the bathroom floor. You weren’t allowed visitors but there were no staff there so everyone was just breaking the rules and inviting people round. It was a really scary situation to be in.
I felt every emotion you could possibly feel. Fear, sadness, but mainly loneliness. I was lonely because I found it hard to keep in touch with people because I couldn’t pay my phone bill and there wasn’t any internet so I was just sitting in my locked room on my own to stay away from the arguments going on in the house.
I was desperate to get out so I contacted the Council but they told me I was not a priority. I was an adult at 22. I had mental health issues, debt and no children living with me so I was not a priority.
I finally found YMCA where I was given a flat to stay in and I couldn’t be more grateful for their support and yours also.
Within a few weeks I was going to the gym and thinking about my dreams and aspirations. YMCA have organised for me to have weekly counselling sessions which have already really helped. It took a lot of work before I could even say my little siblings names again. I am getting help to sort my finances out with budgeting support. I am getting one to ones with staff and they are helping me with my future plans and keep motivating me. I go to the gym with staff and attend classes with members of the YMCA gym. I love it. I am currently deciding on whether to study business or counselling at college and then go onto university. I am currently working two days a week in a café.
YMCA are helping me with these decisions. I have regular sessions with my keyworker but every single member of staff will help in whichever way they can. They couldn’t be more helpful.
I honestly have no idea what I’d be doing right now if it wasn’t for the YMCA. I’d probably still be on the streets. It’s turned my whole life around and it gave me a reason to try and sort myself out.
I would encourage any other young person in the same position I found myself in to never give up. Be resourceful and keep looking for what you need/want.
Thank you for supporting YMCA and helping to support young people like me. I’m so grateful for your generosity.
Kind regards,
Sophie
Congratulations, Sophie, you have survived horrendous circumstances. Even though it may not have felt it at the time, every time you came through another set back, you became stronger. Good luck in the future, I’m sure you will have a good one.
Thank you for your honesty and courage Sophie.
You could have given up at any time and nearly did in 2013.
You are an inspirational young lady and have so much experience to share with others.
I hope your life continues to improve and it will if you keep up the good work you’ve started.
It will not always be easy but it will be worth it.
Follow your dreams. You can be anything you wish to be. xxx
I would like to thank Sophie for sharing her experiences with us.
Those times for her must have been very frightening, and I am so glad she found YMCA.
And glad too that I found them, as homelessness has always been a concern to me, very nearly being in such a situation myself.
Although we are not in a position to increase donations, as we support other charities that
support our concerns, I want you to know you are always on our hearts ,and our prayers are always with you.
God bless you.
You are welcomed i am only too pleased to be in a situation too help people may you keep strong x
Well done Sophie, glad things you have been given this opportunity to turn your life around. Good luck with your studies, and at university. I sponsor a room because of a someone in my extended family who had a similar opportunity.
A sad story, but at least with a positive ending. What more can I do, I wonder.
Hi Sophie, thanks for writing that letter to us. You have had to go through so much from when you were so young, and it is an inspiration to hear how you are now doing so well. I am so glad you found the YMCA, and very grateful to the keyworkers and all the other staff who are helping you. Keep on moving forward, and I hope you see your dreams come true.
Hi Sophie You have my favourite name. You have had a very hard time so congratulations on the progress you have made. Well done. I I pray you will continue to have success with your studies Jill
Thankyou Sophie for sharing this with us. You are an inspiration and you are doing so well. Follow your dreams and aspirations and with all good wishes to you in the future. With kind regards from Vivien
Thank you Sophie for sharing your experiences and enlightening me about the work of the YMCA. What courage you have and what strength of character. You have overcome so many negative experiences and I am sure you will achieve great things. Continue with your studies and I wish you happiness and peace.
What a heart breaking story, so sorry to hear what you’ve been through, but glad that you’ve found some help and YMCA are able to be there to support you.
PS: Fantastically well written piece, you should give some consideration to journalism if you’re looking for a career choice, with writing that clear, concise and heartfelt you’d go far.
Sophie with all the trauma of your early life, you are now making great strides and turning your life around. I am sure now with the support of YMCA you will achieve your gaols. You are a remarkable young lady and should be very proud of your achievements and progress!
With every good wish, Norma.
So proud of the way you gave turned your life around Sophie, you are an inspiration to other young people. I am so happy to be a room sponsor for the YMCA as it seems I can really make a difference in the lives of young people who just need a hand up in life. I wish you well in life and much success. God Bless.
Thank you for sharing. You have already moved on so much and may the trend continue.
Dear Sophie,
You have the gift of being able to express yourself in writing that will stand you in great stead as your university life begins. May your God go with you in all that you do in the future.
What a tragic life you’ve had from such an early age, I’m so proud of where you’ve got to now, and I know all that you’ve been through you will be able to use, whether in counselling others, or just supporting other teens that come into YMCA, because you’ll understand where they’ve come from. Bless you for your honesty, and I look forward to hearing more in the future. xxx
Hi Sophie, thank you for sharing your story. I’m so glad that you have stability now. It sounds like you are a very strong lady and you have held it together so well. A lot of people wouldn’t have done. I’d just like to let you know that there are support groups for people who.have grown up with addicted parents. These can be helpful when the counselling runs out, which does eventually, unfortunately. There are people out there who have been through similar things and are happy to listen. The group’s are also very cheap 😉 Good luck with college… Read more »
Thank you for sharing your journey, Sophie. Keep going & very best wishes for a much happier & safer future ahead if you. And thanks to all st the YMCA for all they do x
A story that really touches the heart with sadness, inspiration and optimism. Reading stories like yours, shows the importance of programs like room sponsorship and organisations like YMCA in supporting that break that Sophie and unfortunately, so many others need in life. Good look with the future Sophie. Work and study hard. You have character and I’m sure you’ll benefit greatly from the opportunity the YMCA offers to change your life for good.
Well done, Sophie – and well written. Although you’ve been through some really hard times, in some ways it will make you stronger, and you can use that in the future. I feel you are now on your way, and although there will be times in the future when things may not be going as well as you want you will now know that all you have to do is stick with it and you will get through. Up to now, you have solved most of the problems you’ve ever had – so just keep going. Very best wishes to… Read more »
Dear Sophie, you are an amazing young woman. You are more special and deserving than you know. Those hardships and sorrows which you have experienced and survived make you stronger. You remind me of the “ancient art of repairing broken pottery with gold” (please google it) With Love Christine x
Hello Sophie. I was so sorry to read your story but full of admiration for you! I’m so glad that you are now with the YMCA and that they have all helped you turn you life around. You have been so brave and strong to keep going and I wish you the very best wishes and good luck for the future- you so deserve it. Jenny XX.
Hi Sophie Thank you for sharing your story. You are one resilient young woman and I am so proud of you and your achievements. Thank you too for confirming I did the right thing in becoming a room sponsor.
A sad story, Sophie, but what courage and character you have! Keep up the good work. You deserve every happiness. Well done. x