Dear Roomsponsor,
My name is Charlie and I’m 19 years old. I wanted to share my story of how I came to be at YMCA and how much my life has changed for the better thanks to the support of people like you.
I have little memory of living with my parents when I was young. I went into care when I was six so I never had a relationship with my family. To be honest, I can’t really remember a time before I was in care.
It is hard to describe what it was like having five different foster placements growing up, but I can see now that I faced challenges that other kids didn’t have. In the foster system you have no understanding of what having a consistent family is like as you’d never know how long you would be in one place or where you would end up next.
I didn’t have any role models or anyone who knew me that I could lean on for support. I had no one I could rely on. Once I had begun to feel settled in one place I would be moved and the family I was living with would disappear from my life completely. This made me feel like I was dispensable, and that no one truly cared about me. Over time it became hard for me to trust or feel close to other people as I didn’t have any sense of belonging to one family.
Every time I moved to a different home I would also be moving to a different community which included starting at a new school. It was almost impossible to make friends and I was bullied quite a lot probably because it is easier to pick on the new kid. I would constantly have to mould myself to fit in with new friends and family despite not spending enough time with them to build meaningful relationships. This was so difficult to deal with as a child, and because of this, I felt low and anxious all the time. It’s no wonder my mental health began to suffer.
At the age of 17, I knew I had to leave foster care and break this cycle. I kept asking myself ‘where could I go now?’ and the thought of potentially sleeping on the streets was so scary.
Left with no choice, I started contacting my mum. We barely knew each other at all at that point but I thought my best option would be to move in with her. It felt good that we were finally speaking, but it is so hard to build trust with someone who is basically a stranger to you. She hadn’t been part of my life for so long and had other kids by then, so it felt like I was just getting in the way. It made me sad to think of her house as just one more place where I didn’t quite belong.
During this time I had just started college and I wanted to do well but the household often felt too busy and chaotic. I was struggling to focus. I was lost and overwhelmed. One night, my stress levels hit a boiling point and resulted in a big argument with my mum. The feelings of anxiety and stress escalated. Eventually, I couldn’t take it any longer and I needed a way out.
Moving out with no plan would mean I had no roof over my head. I was still only 17 at the time, what could I have done? That’s when it hit me that I was completely alone. As a care leaver, I didn’t have any kind of support network behind me who could help me emotionally or financially through this. This was one of the hardest moments of my life.
I am pleased to let you know that soon after this I was referred to YMCA. I was able to move in quickly which was such a relief. I was quite nervous to begin with as it was a big change to suddenly be living by myself in an area I didn’t know anyone.
Luckily, it didn’t take very long for me to find my feet. All the staff at YMCA were welcoming and were always on hand if I needed to speak about anything.
The most important thing for me since arriving has been the improvements in my mental health. I was referred to a counselling service as soon as I arrived and I’ve finally been able to put my feelings about my past into perspective. It’s been good to speak openly about growing up in foster care and how it has affected me.
I have fortnightly meetings with my support worker here and we also have group meetings where we talk about things like money and budgeting. I’ve even taken part in some cooking classes, I remember one week we made pizzas which was a lot of fun.
It’s been over 2 years since I arrived at YMCA now and so much has changed in my life for the better. Having the stability of a place to stay and the encouragement of the staff here has made all the difference. I was able to finish my public services course at college and I now have a full-time job which I’m really enjoying. It’s keeping me busy and I have learnt lots of new skills. Earning my own money has given me more freedom and has pushed me to becoming more independent.
The best part about staying at YMCA is how friendly everyone has been and all the support that is right there on hand whenever I need it. I’d definitely recommend YMCA to other young people who are in a similar situation to me, especially if they are coming out of foster care. YMCA was the stepping stone I needed to have space to finish college, sort out my finances and start to plan for the future.
Thank you so much for being a Roomsponsor. With your help, other young people like me will have a safe space where they feel like they can belong and access to the support they need to turn their lives around.
Kind regards,
Charlie
Well done Charlie, thank you for your uplifting story – It seems to me that you are one of those people who is a lot stronger than they realise. So glad to have helped a tiny bit. Best wishes for the future – and pleased to see you are working in public services which is also helping others.
I am glad you are doing so well. Keep going for a bright future
Well done Charlie, you should be very proud of yourself. You’ve achieved so much. Never give up. 🙂
Dear Charlie,
I’m so pleased YMCA has worked for you. Best wishes for the future, and may your God go with you.
Keith
Great to hear you are doing well Charlie, keep up the good work. All the best for the future.
Hello Charlie. I’m so glad that the YMCA has helped you to find your feet, and that you now have support and stability in your life. I wish you all the best for the future and hope that you feel proud of yourself for what you are achieving. Carry on with the cooking!! Jenny. X
Well done Charlie. It’s so good to hear that the YMCA has been able to help you turn your life around. It is pleasing to know that the small contribution I make is helping young people like you have a fresh start.
Thank you so much for sharing your story Charlie. Well done for all you’ve achieved. All the best for the future